Aditi slumped on the chair . She was shell shocked , her eyes were closed. Perspiration was seen on her forehead. She was shivering a bit. Her ears reverberated Dr. Chowdhury advise ,”self sacrifice is good but only up to a noted point. Self sacrifice is good for a noble cause . It’s no virtue if done repeatedly at the cost of your own desire and self . Beyond a point it is called martyr syndrome .”
Her mind was racing back to her childhood , she was very fond of her grand mother , Tarulata devi. “Baroma, you paint so well , please teach me ….hold the pencil, draw a circle , practice.”
Her grandmother would often narrate the story of the young prince who grew up to be so because of some ones sacrifice .”There was a maid in Chittorgarh , Rajasthan. …she sacrificed her own little son to save the life of the young prince, who later grew up to become the Rana of Chittorgarh. ”
Aditi was a meritorious student an excellent painter and a dancer. She was married to Subro who worked in a big company. She subjected herself to multiple sacrifices for her family consisting of husband mother in law and later her son and daughter. She became increasingly depressed. She lost all interest in life .She would often think to her self” what has any one ever done for me I have given up so much for them all my life”.
She would often get into this self pity mode and slowly she started losing her weight, hair , beauty and even interest in painting . This depressed her more . It became increasingly unbearable more so because of her husband’s nonchalant attitude” I don’t really care what’s going on with you “.
After so many instances in life , she stepped into the psychologists chamber.
During self analysis she was helped to understand her behavior pattern which caused the depression. ” Her need to be the martyr all the time.” She was counselled that if she didn’t get the happiness you want sacrifices won’t help you either….