Young couple Satish and Vedika are married for three years, both are working in MNCs and they are living together in an apartment. This case was referred for marriage counseling.
The case was that Satish had series of extramarital affairs and Vedika was completely stressed and embarrassed due to his cheating.
How did it all begin …as per Satish. “I used to come home tired thirsty hungry sweaty after a long days work often with a low back pain .My wife immediately would counter me with various domestic questions even before I have been able to catch my breath or unwind. In reply I would shout at her and try to intimidate her and before I could control my temper a lot of derogatory names would be thrown at her by me.
Vedika in a reflex retaliation used to deny me sex even after we had patched up.
This is a very common occurrence in every household . This incident in this particular case lead to
1. Loss of love
2. Satish developed sexual dysfunctions
3. Satish indulged in extramarital dating to fulfill the love vaccum in his life.
4 . Cheating and embarrassment forced Vedika for a separation and she considered divorce.
Remedy: how one should manage such situations .Vedika should have asked Satish,”oh come on I would want to have a talk with you and let’s sit down after dinner for a talk.”
Or Satish should have replied okay,” I can’t answer this issues now but lets take it up for discussion after dinner.”
Moral: Never try to win an argument by shouting ,intimidation or name calling . Always negotiate. Time your arguments when both partners are receptive.